Don't Go Grillin' My Heart

Stop Press! I want Bobby Flay's babies! This fine purveyor of southwestern grub and veritable Food Network icon (Can you say Iron Chef America?) might just be the hottest thing since all those old people died in France. With his NY restaurants Mesa Grill and the recently opened Bar American, Flay is not only a master of culinary fortitude, but a fine Irish motherfucker. He's funny, he's a sweetheart (I've met him a few times now, and seriously creme fraiched my pants), and he loves cheese. But what? He's taken? Sadly ladies, tis true. To an equally lovely actress named Stephanie March of Law and Order fame. She's tall, she's skinny, and according to Bobby, she loves to eat. Shit bitches. If that's the criteria, I guess I'm out of the running.